None of us likes receiving criticism. Nevertheless it\u2019s an unavoidable reality. Because nobody is perfect, we will receive criticism both in the workplace as well as in our everyday lives. The ability to receive and respond constructively to criticism is a measure of a person\u2019s emotional maturity. Here are some steps I\u2019ve found to be helpful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
.<\/mark><\/p>\n\n\n\n Active listening is reflecting back to the other what you\u2019ve heard. The two key active listening skills at this point are paraphrase and perception check. Paraphrase is summarising in your own words what you\u2019ve heard the other person say. Perception check is reflecting the feelings you\u2019ve picked up behind their actual words. The purpose here is to check that the content you\u2019ve heard and the feelings you\u2019ve discerned in the criticism are what your critic meant.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For example, following a presentation you recently made to your fellow managers you receive feedback that one of them was dissatisfied. Your possible response to the person could be: \u201cI hear you\u2019re disappointed with my presentation. Were you unhappy with the content or how I was delivering it? Can you help me to understand the problem?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n 2. Don\u2019t Deny, Justify or Excuse \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n At this point it\u2019s important not to react to what you\u2019ve been hearing. So don\u2019t deny your behaviour that led to the criticism, or make excuses by justifying your actions or blaming others. Simply allow the criticism to sit with you. This creates the space for the critic to explain further or ask you to explain the reasons for your behaviour. It shifts the focus from yourself to the other which allows you the emotional space to gather yourself and reflect on the appropriate response. As part of your reflection, ask yourself what can you learn from this encounter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 3. Respond<\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n If following step 2 your critic asks you to explain do so as politely and non-emotionally as you can. Just give the facts from your perspective making sure you make clear your motivation or reason for your actions. Also it\u2019s then up to your critic to assess whether your explanation is sufficient to satisfy her\/him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 4. Offer to Explain<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n If your critic doesn\u2019t invite you to explain the reasons for your behaviour take the initiative and ask if they would like you to do so. It\u2019s futile to offer an explanation if your critic is not willing to listen. In that case whatever you say won\u2019t be received and it will only seem you are trying to justify your actions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 5. Listen to Your Critic\u2019s Response<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Once your critic shows willingness and hears your explanation check for their response. Are they satisfied with what you\u2019ve said or not? If they are, no further action on your part is probably required. But if not, there\u2019s a further step to consider.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 6. Your Response<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n As indicated in step 5, if your explanation doesn\u2019t satisfy your critic you will need to decide your next step. Options include:<\/p>\n\n\n\n In Conclusion – Reframe and Thank<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n When receiving criticism always reframe it as feedback. Whereas criticism tends to come across as negative (even so-called \u2018constructive criticism\u2019) \u2018feedback\u2019 is neutral. By reframing the criticism as feedback you are giving yourself greater agency in dealing with the issue. Furthermore, always thank the person for giving you such feedback even if they were meaning to be negative. By thanking them you\u2019re also reframing their communication as being somewhat positive. However, be sure not to come across as sarcastic (so watch your tone of voice and body language). This both takes the sting out of their words as well as giving you a sense of power in the relationship.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Receiving criticism – yes, even the constructive kind – can be tough. But it\u2019s also a powerful opportunity for growth. In his practical and down-to-earth style, Graham Beattie offers helpful strategies for responding well when criticism comes your way.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":2997,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,6,34],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2996","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-accountability","category-communication","category-personal-development"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2996","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2996"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2996\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3000,"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2996\/revisions\/3000"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2997"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2996"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2996"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.australiancoachingcollective.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2996"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\n
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